I had two interesting phone conversations over the last 12 hours.
Last night I spoke with Tish. Now I don't know exactly how this topic came up; it had something to do with my amazing ability to do dead on elmo and kermit impersonations and my annoying habit of doing so mid coitis "Kermit loves your lilly pads!" or "He he he, Elmo's almost there!" but I digress... For some reason we started debating on the details of Miss Piggy's love life. Now anyone who watched The Muppets knows that she wasn't getting what she needed from ol' Kermit and had to resort to other cast members for satisfaction. The question is, who did Piggy have the most tail curling sex with? Beaker, Animal or Robin (Kermit's little nephew)? I'm kinda rootin for Robin (you know, the revenge sex thing) of course Beaker's got that freak thing going for him I'm sure. I bet Animal will win for obvious reasons but I imagine Piggy would say he isn't very coachable. So, who would you say and what is your reasoning behind it?
The other conversation took place with Kalani Friday morning. It was painfully obvious from the very start that something was not well with her. There were a lot of incomplete sentences, heavy sighs and deep breaths scattered with long pauses in between broken and partial sentences. "I can't keep doing... (sigh)... one of these days I'm not going to be able to... (exhasperated sigh)... life would just be so much easier if... (stammer then heavy sigh). It went on like this for some time.
In the end I couldn't quite figure out the problem. It had something to do with a paddle, a coworker, soup that needs to be 'tanned' (twice apparently but not three times), a ride home, and constantly moving molecules. I'm pretty sure the conversation could have been boiled down to her saying "I really need to get some!" but we cover that every time we talk so I just don't know. I was left feeling concerned, confused and really turned on by the idea of a female chemist paddling a vat of soup.
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